Rey Maualuga of Cincinnati Bengals Charged with DUI

The offseason was less than one month old when Mr. Rey Maualuga decided to use some awful judgment.

The 23-year-old was arrested at 1:45 a.m. Friday in Covington, Ky. on charges of drunken and careless driving after he allegedly struck two parked cars and a parking meter.

Maualuga, 23, of Cincinnati, appeared in Kenton County District Court via video link from jail. He pleaded not guilty and was released on his promise to return for future appearances.

Maualuga smelled of "intoxicants" and told the officer that he had "about six Captain and Coke drinks," the report states. The officer gave Maualuga field sobriety tests, which he failed, the report states.

"Subject had slurred speech, blood shot, watery eyes and he was unsteady on his feet," the officer wrote.

Maualuga had a blood-alcohol level of .157, according to a Covington Police report. The legal limit is .08.

A Bengals spokesman declined comment.

Covington literally borders the city of Cincinnati, so I'm sure he had partied in the city and was trying to make it to his apartment or whatever in Kentucky.

But this story gets funnier. He was driving a 2003 Pontiac Sunfire. C'mon Rey, that's the best a second round pick can do? No Hummer or Escalade?

Even funnier: He was with two female passengers.

Funniest: One of the girls was 18, and the other was a minor! Rey Rey! Can't find any 23-year-olds in the city on a Thursday night?

In the words of Michael Irvin—C'MON MAN!!!!